Blog exclusive:

Trademarks are protected when they indicate the source of the product or service. But when the meaning of what once might have been a trademark begins instead to indicate the product or service itself, then it may become “genericized.” In the United States, there are protected marks, generic terms, and—most interesting to me—marks that the public only thinks have become generic, but that are, in actuality, still protected.

In thinking about this, I decided to write two spy stories: One with former trademarks that have become generic in the United States and the other with trademarks that people might only think have become generic in the United States. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, will be to detect which story is which below. If you fail, we will disavow any knowledge of your connection to this blog. Good luck. (Light the fuse. Cue the theme music.). The answer is at the bottom. 

Story No. 1:

I woke up in a laundromat, which isn’t unusual in my line of work. What was unusual was that I couldn’t remember how I got there. Or why I was in a tuxedo that smelled like kerosene. And why my brain felt like a yo-yo going up and down. Maybe it had something to do with my last memory from the night before: it was of that guy, the one who looked like a heroin addict. He tossed a thermos at my head from the escalator, and I just forgot to duck. Oh, I should’ve been a realtor like my brother.

Story No. 2:

I woke up in a dumpster, which isn’t unusual in my line of work. What was unusual was that I couldn’t remember how I got there. Or why I was in a onesie that smelled like—well, you don’t really want to know. And why my brain felt like a ping-pong ball bouncing back and forth. Maybe it had something to do with my last memory from the night before: it was of that guy, the one who looked like a cook. He tossed a crock-pot at my head from the cigarette boat, and I just forgot to duck. Oh, I should’ve been a realtor like my brother.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Story No. 1 has the genericized terms. Story No. 2 uses the still-protected trademarks.